I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
