Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
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