yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
I need to sanitize my soul.
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Also apparently I made a "cake sandwich"--yeah smashed a massive piece of cake between two slices of bread....fucking tequila
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