Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
You threw up in a empty pizza box at Pizza Hut and opened the door with your face. So that maybe why it's bruised.
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
Colombian exchange intern from my Mom's friend's ranch loves me, and is staying the night because we got each other drunk. Successful Christmas? I think yes.
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
Randomize
