when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
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Bring your kids so they can distract our kids so we can drink beer in peace.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
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Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Really dude? drunk texts at 9 in the morning? its wednesday
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