The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
and then you two started interpretive dancing to Mozart
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
She can't take shots?!? Literally if I could list that as a skill on a resume I would
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