Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
okay. well, yeah. i'm a mess and a half. this shit is not what dumbledore died for.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
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