Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
We need to start having sex underwater more often.
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
