i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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