I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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