im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
That's what I'm talking about
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for