we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
21 People Intentionally Did Despicable Things During Sex
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
someone just laughed at me while i'm laying on the floor waiting for the bus. like they've never been hungover.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
20 People Confess What It’s Really Like To Live Under Sharia Law
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult