p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Just threw up my room service breakfast with my fake eyelashes and pearls still on.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
We left an ass print on the piano.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
My vagina is very pro this idea
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
