We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
we're out of white wine, toilet paper and windex... too hard to explain via text
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
We went camping and met these lesbians and now I have S'mores where there shouldn't be S'mores.
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
I'm both gender and math confused
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Randomize
