just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I went to the gas station and the lady goes I remember you. Broken sunglasses and puke on your car.
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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