Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I spent all night sexting your girlfriend for you because you were too drunk. You're welcome.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Randomize
