Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
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