if you like me you must not know who I am
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
My phone has started autocorrecting "monogamy" to "monogamish"
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
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