My sheets look like a crime scene.
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I either have a razor blade lodged in my throat or I've been drinking entirely too much Evan Williams.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
i think i just lost a toe
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