ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
I currently don't understand fingers.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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