As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
You better have a raging boner when I get to your house and it better be worth missing work in the morning.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
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