I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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