Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I wish you could buy pregnancy test at the liquor store, it's the only place I feel comfortable being a disgrace because I know they understand why it happened...
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
For once I'd like to have a Taco Sunday without having some random drunk chick flee my house half naked and in tears.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
