Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Grandma just handed out bail money... it's officially christmas
I walked in on you eating olive oil off of a plate. you gave me this look and I just started crying. we were that drunk.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
Fuck off. Since when do you love him??
Since he licked my arm to retrieve the macaroni and cheese he dropped. You have to appreciate that
Can't even lie. Mad respect
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Randomize
