FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
We're stoned and watching little Einstein videos. Come. Over. Now.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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