He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
Thanks for letting me rent out your vagina rec room. I don't expect the security deposit back.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Im too stoned for my mom to be picking up hitch hikers. Help.
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