she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
tried to make it look like I had been conscious/awake and out all day when I stumbled into cvs at 6pm to buy plan B
update: I failed
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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