Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
She got her phone back last night. And the first thing I sent her was a picture of me pooping in a culvers bathroom
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
Randomize
