I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
It's a gateway drink.... Starts with wine... Then I wake up in my car with mascara on my arms covered in french fries...
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
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