I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize