do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i found a roscoes card in my pocket that says 'fuck me bare fo $15.20'. Wow
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
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