that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I need to get my pants from under your porch. People are asking questions.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
I'm eating an ice cream cone and pooping. Don't know how I'm gonna wipe.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
