that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Randomize
