Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize