My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I can feel my liver begging me to stop.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
Randomize
