I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
Randomize