I have a walk of shame I should be getting to. "Hey, by the way, what is your name?" is not a conversation I want to have today
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
she just gave me a present from you... on a stripper pole. in front of the whole club. :)
WHY ISNT THIS A PICTURE MESSAGE
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
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