can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
I just followed a trail of feathers and glitter to class. Today better be fucking magical.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
You have got to be the only man who has passed out while getting a lap dance.
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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