so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
He’s like an awkward walking penis that has a personality attached
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