Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
Romantically speaking, I want to sit on his face.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Stupid adulating
Yeah it sucks, but at least I can buy wine so it all comes out in the wash
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Randomize
