your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Just when I decided to go get a taco and a blunt cake it starts raining. Coincidence? or divine intervention?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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