More tranny stories later!
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
