There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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