Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Randomize