his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
IM NOT TALKING TO YOU UNTIL YOU MAKE A PROCLAMATION YOU LOVE ME MORE THAN TACOS
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
Look I'm really hungover so let's try this again. In 5 mins you're gonna call me and tell me that you're on your way with xannies, iced coffee and a back rub
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
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