I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
My hand is eating my burrito and not saving any for my mouth. TRIPPPPPPPPPPPPPPINN!
I positioned my bed perfectly so around 10 a.m. every morning there are rays of sunshine coming through the window in my room. Now i can tan while PTFO.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
If you hit me with your dick and make light saber noises we are breaking up. I don't care if it's your birthday, you are not a sex Jedi.
So is singing the star wars theme as I put the condom on off limits?
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
Randomize