Do u have any bacon or vodka by chance
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Randomize
