I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
Sorry the STD update turned into an attempt at a bootycall, but at least we both know we're clean now
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
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