The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Dude, she found the red hair dye from 4th of July. then she proceeded to give you a red mohawk for a more patriotic thanksgiving eve. How do you not remember that?
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
For future reference, don't put tape on your nipples. Ouch.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Never joke about your clitoris.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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