my dad just told me that a lesbian kissed my mom at a bar last year
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
Randomize