I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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