This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
Im gonna take a shit then figure out how to be better at basketball
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Randomize
