Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I like to use the word "seasoned" over "slutty", you know, like a good curly fry
i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
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