That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
if we break up, who will get the dealer?
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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